


Professors Are People Too

by rainbowpiranha



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, Flirting, Harry Potter - Freeform, Hooch - Freeform, Humor, McGonagall - Freeform, Oneshot, f/f - Freeform, light - Freeform, mcgonagall/hooch - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-09-02 06:45:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8654806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowpiranha/pseuds/rainbowpiranha
Summary: Rolanda Hooch reflects fondly on her relationship with Minerva McGonagall.Quick, light-hearted and humorous.Slightly AU in the sense that Hooch and McGonagall are portrayed as close in age, when in canon Hooch is about 30 years older.  Also, for this fic. I’m ignoring the fact that any characters have died.Rolanda’s POV.Mentions of sex, some of which occurred when they were underage, which is why it’s rated “M”.  Nothing is explicitly described.





	

"I fell in love with her after the fourth date in our sixth year at school," I remembered fondly. "We went back to Hogwarts after a wonderful meal in Hogsmeade and shagged in a broom closet for hours!"

Sirius made a noise in the back of his throat, half-way between a laugh and a snort of disbelief.

"What?" I asked, amused. "She's not always as uptight as she seems."

"Rolanda!" Minerva objected as her eyes narrowed in my direction. "Some of those listening to your conversation are our students!"

I looked around the drawing room of Grimmauld Place, lazily waiting for Tonks to make a move in the game of Wizard’s Chess we were playing, and noted that Minerva was right, as usual. Many of our students were indeed in ear-shot of our conversation, regardless of if they were visibly listening or not.

Seated on a comfortable, faded grey couch were Hermione and Ron. Hermione had a book in her lap, head bent reading, and Ron had his nose buried deep in a Quidditch magazine. Their close physical proximity and the comfortable accidental brushing of fingers and knees seemed to suggest that they were intimate enough where they wouldn’t mind hearing a bit about my sex life.

But then again I always assumed everyone wanted to hear about my sex life.

Next to Hermione and Ron, Ginny and Harry were stuffed between the arms of a matching grey recliner chair. As uncomfortable as it looked to me, they seemed to be enjoying their closeness as they both thumbed through the same magazine advertising Fred and George’s products. Apart from the occasional giggle or gasp at a particularly obscene product, they seemed quietly engrossed in their own world. 

Again, no worry to me if they heard what I was saying or not.

Sirius, Remus, and Minerva sat in various mismatched chairs around the table that Tonks and I were using to play Wizard's Chess.

Those seated around the table were the ones I was aiming my comments at, simply for my own amusement, but they seemed to be enjoying the fact that for once Minerva seemed down-to-earth, even if she was slightly uncomfortable.

"I’ve seen my fair share of students shagging in the locker rooms after a Quidditch match," I justified after a moment of thought. “I highly doubt I’m going to corrupt any listening ears.”

Even from across the room, I could see the tips of Ginny’s ears turn red. I guess she was listening.

Minerva folded her arms across her chest, but made no noise of protest. I took that as my cue to go on.

“We weren’t the only professors to shag in a Hogwarts broom closet, I’m sure,” I elaborated. “But we may have been the first to shag in the Room of Requirement, both of our offices, the library, and a broom closet.”

I smiled to myself as I instructed my pawn to move forward. I liked exposing this side of Minerva to others. Whether she realized it or not, people were curious about her personal life since she kept herself so guarded all the time. It humanized her and amused me all at the same time.

"Minerva McGonagall would never desecrate a library!” Sirius mocked with feigned offense, tearing his eyes off the chessboard for a moment to eye Minerva deviously.

“I never desecrated anything!” Minerva insisted. Quietly she added, “Rolanda just has a habit of convincing me to do things in places I normally wouldn’t do them!”

In spite of herself, Minerva’s lips curved into a smile. I knew she liked that I could loosen her up a bit, and our adventures in the library were fond memories to both of us. Besides, I enjoyed the game of seeing how far I could embarrass her without actually upsetting her. It was almost like a risky game of Quidditch for me.

“You know, it kind of surprises me that you two are together,” Tonks admitted, glaring at the chessboard as one of my pieces destroyed her rook. 

“Somehow she puts up with me,” I grinned, rubbing Minerva’s knee gently under the table.

“And Rolanda does keep life...interesting,” admitted Minerva.

“Everyone assumed you were gay,” Tonks admitted, nodding in my direction. “When I was in Hogwarts, I mean. But then again, when I wore my hair short for the first time, everyone assumed that about me, too, so maybe it’s just your hair?”

“And the fact that you can out-drink me,” Sirius added, elbowing me lightly in the side. He looked towards Minerva and added, “Have you seen how much Firewhiskey she can drink?”

Minerva smiled as she sighed, “I have. And, against my better judgement, I have been known to encourage such adventures.”

I laughed and smiled at Minerva. “I’m even funnier when I’m drunk!”

“As long as you think that, dear…” Minerva responded.

Remus laughed lightly, pointing out, "Well, you never know about those strong, intelligent women." 

He winked at Minerva before returning to analyze the chess game.

The conversation lulled as our chess game intensified. It was well known that I was good at this game, but it was obvious that Tonks had been practicing. 

“Bugger!” Tonks snorted as I finally took her king. “You win again.”

“Never play chess against a Quidditch master,” Minerva cautioned. “She’ll either win or pout until you give her another chance.”

“Thank you, thank you,” I responded as I stood up and bowed. “I think the pout only works on you, dear.”

The pieces reset themselves to prepare for a new set of challengers: Sirius and Remus.

“So,” Fred said, suddenly appearing out of nowhere, stuffing a thin, pale string into his pocket. “I think we should return to the fact that professors at our wonderfully dignified school of Hogwarts are shagging when students aren’t around.”

“It seems like a double standard,” George continued when he appeared beside his brother. “Since we’re not allowed to.”

“Says who?” I asked. “As long as you’re of age and not in a public place, you’re free to shag whoever you want.”

“With their consent, of course,” Minerva added quickly.

“James took advantage of that in our final year,” Sirius remembered fondly. “I can’t even count the number of times I walked in on him and Lily shagging in our dormitory.”

“Then maybe you should knock before you enter a room,” chastised Remus, his cheeks turning red as he remembered multiple times that Sirius had caught him in unfavorable positions with his hand.

“Do you remember that time we walked in on Professor Vector and Professor Burbage shagging?” Fred asked.

“I can’t un-see that!” George responded, covering his eyes dramatically.

“Professors are people, too,” I answered with a laugh, ready to watch the new chess game unfold.

**Author's Note:**

> I really like playing with Hooch as a character. She was first minor characters that I fell in love with because in my headcanon she’s a strong, sex-positive, queer person (like me!). I hope I did her justice in the fic.
> 
> As always, please let me know what you think (both good and bad)!


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